a long poem of waiting, for one who wants to read

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A Poem of Waiting


Tie me a knot. Take me slowly
as I feel my way along the edge.
Go 'head, fall
to me, my hands are free; i'm just waiting.
Fall on me, next to me, push me,
please.
You’re like sap, quietly running.
***

My fingers, they want to feel the directions your eyebrows
move, wisps of hair, lips that part, the ridge of your nose,
gentle neckline,
deep collarbones above your breasts.
They want to count your ribcage
make prophecies
on your spine.
**

Every letter that begins is unfinished.
What I want to say is too much,
it's not enough.
I lace my hands
Under my feet,
and rock, rock, rock,
good night. good night.
**

Love, I want to see you
a boy of fourteen
or a man of sixty—perhaps
Skip the manly age
You are in.
**

Each pick up of a book
I must put down:
I haven’t finished
All I wanted to say yet.
**

bury your memories for good,
daddy,
in the groves of pomelo trees,
where she drowned, or slept,
under the shades of pomelo trees.
**

12:10 and winds are drifting,
all I can do this hour
is turn the coffee cup in my hands,
red droplets staining my knuckles.
All the while turning
Turning
Turning.
**

Spit them out like iron claves
Spitting wilted petals dripping on my tongue
Spit out lemon seeds
prattling:
Tsk! Tsk! Tsk!
**

I was sitting there, waiting,
When he asked me how i am.
I wanted to tell him
Ask me instead, if I’m happy,
How my soul is even,
Ask me what I’m thinking,
How I feel,
What and who I miss, sitting there—
Just not
how i am.
**

I miss you most
when light-headed,
Inhalation of cigarette smoke,
black paint on your breast
and the underside of my arm,
when I hear excuse me, mad’am,
you’re not allowed.